I know I am terrible at updating, but I do have a smattering of fun pics from Christmas.  Christmas was good...but hard.  Just...so weird not having mom there, and sad.  But much of my family was together, and we were there for over a week!  It was so nice having a good chunk of time "back home" and being together.

...And because I am super lazy, please check out the pics which have been uploaded to my facebook - just easier than doing the whole thing again here (:

www.facebook.com/album.php 

Hope you enjoy (:

Man, December always seems to go by so fast. And I really need to get some pictures up on here soon, dang it.

As I am at work (again), this will be a really quick update, for those of you who want to know the latest with my mom. She got the results from her PET Scan back, and thank goodness, her cancer is really just localized to that one area - it hasn't spread anywhere else. She will be doing intraveinous chemotherapy, but the one she will be taking has comparitively minimal side effects, which will definitely be a help. We are so grateful that it will be easily treatable, and that it isn't anywhere else in her body. Good news for sure!

Other than that, just preparing to go to CO on Saturday. Mark and I are driving over, and we get to stay for a little more than a week! WOOHOO! Unless the weather gets crazy, then we can cut it short a couple of days. I am really looking forward to going "home." Colorado still feels like home to me. It will be so nice to see both of our families, and old friends.

Alright, back to work!

PS - Thanks for all of your encouraging comments on my previous entry, about my mom. It really means a lot to me, and I'm sorry for not having replied to each of you individually. I will try to be better at doing so in the future, but I wanted you guys to know how much it means to me (:

So....unfortunately it isn't good news.

She has cancer again. We all just can't believe it. She will go in for a PET scan, *hopefully* before they come over for my cousin's wedding this upcoming Wednesday. That would be ideal - but if not, as soon as possible. They just need to see if it has spread anywhere else - which we all pray it hasn't. That's the next big thing that we are all hoping for. Her other next step will be getting what's called a port surgically put in. Basically, it's this little device that goes in on her chest to make drawing blood and administering intraveinous chemotherapy easier for her and her doctors. She had one the first time she had cancer, and it will be especially needed now. Since she had lymph nodes removed when she had surgery in 2004, which has caused a condition for her called lymphadema(?). She can't have any blood drawn from that side of her body, and her arm has swelled up quite a bit. They think it may be affecting the other side too, so they don't want to take any chances. Plus, my mom has seriously small veins - she's always had problems with needles. I fear I have the same veins >_<

I've just been really depressed about this whole thing. It just doesn't seem fair. But, I know we all have our trials, and if anyone has the guts to take this on again, my mom does. I just really hope it all goes ok for her. And I want to try really hard to give her all the support that I can, even though I live far away. That's one of the hardest things for me - knowing that I can't be there helping her through this. But I am all the more grateful now that Mark and I will be able to take a little more time at Christmas to be there.

I've just gotta do my best to stay positive, and hope that things will turn out ok. I really appreciate all of your comments - I apologize for not having responded individually. (:

This time of year is always so wonderful, kicking off in September. I love the Fall, usually enjoy the winter (except for driving in snow), and there are so many great holidays and times to think of and be with family.

Thanksgiving this year was pretty quiet, but really awesome at the same time. Mark and I did Thanksgiving dinner with just the two of us this year, and it was a lot of fun to cook and spend the day with him. We slept in, lazed around in the morning, did some cleaning, and cooked our "feast." We were much smarter this time than our first year (when we also did it just the two of us). Our first year, we seriously cooked enough food for like, 6 people. We made mashed potatoes with 8 whole potatoes (because you know, I eat four potatoes at a time. What were we thinking??), tons of stuffing, rolls, etc. This time, we gauged much better. I'll try to post pictures soon (doing a quick work post - man, I really do not want to be at work today).

It was so nice just to relax with Mark. I am so thankful for him. He is a great support to me, and always tries to cheer me up when I am feeling down.

That night, Mark went and camped with Linc (Hannah's husband), Linc's brother and sister-in-law. to get a new Wii (by Nintendo). Let's just say that their persevance paid off, all coming away with new Wii's. They were 1st, 3rd, and 4th in line, and that Gamestop got 6 consoles. Mark said that by this morning, there was probably 50 people waiting in line. Mark is so excited (me too, of course), and I am sure he is enjoying his day off at home playing with our new Christmas present. ;)

The reason I call this post "mixed blessings" is because I also found out some potentially bad news on Wednesday. My mom might have cancer again. She had noticed a small little pea sized lump near the same place her cancer came back last year. She went to her doctor's appt. earlier this week, and her doctor is very concerned about the spot as well. She goes in for a biopsy on Monday. We are all really hoping (of course), that it's nothing serious. She has only noticed this for the past 2 or 3 weeks (it wasn't there at her previous appointment 6 weeks ago). I just pray that it's nothing serious. She would have to go back on intra-veinous chemotherapy. She has been continuously taking the pill form since her last bout - her body reacted really well with it, so her doctor just decided to keep her on it in hopes of better staving off further recurrences. But if it is cancer, the pill obviously hasn't been keeping it away.

It just really hurts to see the possibility of her going through this again. Literally, she will have had fought cancer on separate occasions every year since she was initially diagnosed in 2004. This would be her 3rd time.

Yet as always, my mom has such an amazing attitude about it. She always keeps her chin up, and just meets it head on, doing everything she can. She is already preparing herself for the possibility of it being malignant, and having to go through treatment again. She remarked to me as we talked about it that she felt really compelled to get all of her Christmas shopping done, and her Christmas cards out much earlier this year. Now she realizes, it was probably some sort of "premonition", because now she may not have been physically able to do it.

So for those of you who still come to this little blog corner, and happen to read this - if you happen to think about it over the next few days, please keep a prayer in your heart for my mom and my family. We are all really hoping that it's nothing serious. It would be awesome if it wasn't cancerous at all, but if it is, hopefully it's easily treatable, and not spread to anywhere else. She can use a lot of prayers, and any additional ones you all could offer would be much appreciated. (: